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    #219118 07/05/15 06:47 AM
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    I am planning on creating a first day of school teacher gift, something small, for DS5 starting Kinder. Should I include an information sheet about DS? Or would that seem too pushy? If not, what should I say? Does anyone know a good template?

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    I feel like most teachers do an info sheet these days (or at least an "all about me" poster or the like, but those are more limited obviously), but if she doesn't after a week or so maybe offer one/send an email saying thanks for making DS's school start great, here's some info about him btw... I know everyone says don't be pushy but I've been on the other side where it's been ages and no one seems to really know DD smirk But maybe wait and see a bit. Teachers are just learning names the first full week IME.

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    We were wondering what to share last year when DYS DS7 (then 6) started 1st, as well. Within a week or two after school started the teacher ASKED the parents to answer/provide certain info about their children...and then we shared. If you have a good teacher, they might just ask you...and that made us feel less pushy. Had she NOT asked, we may have shared at the first P-T conference, which is near the start of the year.

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    Is giving a first day of school gift normal where you are?

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    Our school does an open house/info session one week into the year which I love as an opportunity to start the dialog. The last two years I've waited patiently at the end of the line and then said something like -

    I know you probably haven't had a chance to read DS's IEP or full psych report. Please contact me if there are issues or if you have any questions. We'd rather deal with things sooner rather than later and in the past we've had teachers let things fester for months which hasn't been good for anyone.

    I can usually tell by their response to this how I want to approach things from there.

    Not sure if that helps since if I remember right your DS is just starting out. One thing to keep in mind depending on where you are is that many of the teachers have been approached by parents who think their kid is crazy smart but in the end was pretty average in a high functioning class (not to say that is your case but just that that is what they might lump you into since they might not have encountered a kid like yours before). When he was younger I preferred to let them get to know DS a bit so they could see for themselves before I started meddling. Now that we've done this for a few years and have psych reports to back us up I'm a bit bolder. Even then I don't really think most teachers understand what 98%ile or 99%ile or >99.9%ile actually means until they experience it first hand. I still occasionally get the "oh it's ok, I've worked with lots of gifted kids" brush off but eventually they usually see what I was trying to hint at. Of course YMMV.

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    Perhaps check with the front office regarding standard procedures first. For our K, the teachers spend a couple of days meeting each parent/child pair and to be some basic testing. That would be a better time to bring up concerns. However, I think the best time is after the teacher has had a chance to interact with the child, perhaps a few weeks into the school year?

    For our 1st thru 3rd grades, the teacher always sent home a one to two page questionnaire where you can share strengths, weaknesses, concerns and requests. However, given how crazy busy they are during the first week, sometimes the papers don't come home until the second week.

    YMMV but I think there is a risk of overstating a child's abilities and leaving the wrong initial impression given that most children likely won't perform as well under the stress, pressure and distractions of a typical classroom versus home one-on-one with the parent. You can secure the best advocate if the teacher can conclude the child's ability without the parent's help. If it is the type of teacher who is hostile to high abilities, then it won't help either way.

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    Thanks everyone!
    puffin, around here it's not a requirement but the teachers do have a small wish list of things they need for the classroom. You can choose something from the list or create something on your own. I think it's a bit gift heavy around here, but oh well.

    We have already had the "Oh sure, I've worked with gifted kids before" line too. I agree with you all. I'll wait until a sheet is set home or there is an open house/ teacher conference. The last thing DS needs is pressure. I want to be on top of things but not overly pushy. The school did state they do testing around Christmas time. We have considered doing our own testing before to have second test result to compare with. Though I am not sure testing would persuade this school system. There aren't gifted options, pull out programs, or acceleration. They won't let him accelerate within the grade either.


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    My advice would be to learn how to project your love of the subjects being taught.

    Enthusiasm is infectious.

    Be prepared to go off on tangents and emphasis the interconnectedness of it all as a way of showing a) the relevance of the tangent and b) as a way of coming back down from the tangent.


    Become what you are

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