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    Originally Posted by Lepa
    While we are on the topic, I have been feeling like I shouldn't really participate in this forum because I do not have a PG child. How do people feel about people with children who are only gifted or HG participating?
    No one will ask you to prove that your child is gifted before replying to your post. Many parents, including myself, have posted about children who have never had an IQ test, although they have shown other signs of giftedness. If you have a question, go ahead and ask it.

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    Originally Posted by Bostonian
    Originally Posted by Lepa
    While we are on the topic, I have been feeling like I shouldn't really participate in this forum because I do not have a PG child. How do people feel about people with children who are only gifted or HG participating?
    No one will ask you to prove that your child is gifted before replying to your post. Many parents, including myself, have posted about children who have never had an IQ test, although they have shown other signs of giftedness. If you have a question, go ahead and ask it.

    This.

    My DD15 has never been tested. A test is just a number-- and a snapshot. Some kids are more photogenic than others, let me also add, here.

    There are "risks" associated with testing, and not everyone is comfortable taking them. (If it's lower than achievement/performance would indicate, then what? If it's HIGHER, is that a burden?)

    Since DD15 is kicking it in a college STEM major, I feel pretty comfortable saying that she's at least HG. She matches up with "PG" qualities on most checklists, etc. The biggest 'tell' in my estimation is the rate of learning that such children are capable of. It's not that they are more mature, more emotional, more-- well, more of anything in particular.

    Like other people, when you've seen one gifted child, you've seen one gifted child. There are tells, I think-- but they aren't what a lot of people think that they are, and they are not easy to observe unless you have a window into the child's everyday life for a long period of time.

    Nobody would have predicted my then-3yo to be anything more than "bright." She doesn't tend to be especially showy, and she's extraordinary at blending in socially-- more than that, she tends to probe others very rapidly for their expectations of her; then she sets about meeting them in every way.


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    My 3 year old is obviously untested. DH and I were both ID'd as gifted as children (I have no IQ test in hand--though there is probably one out there in the ether somewhere-- but was radically accelerated at the school's initiative, and DH is confirmed PG). DS is unmistakably much "more" than any other children I've met. He has no off switch. I feel confident given his behaviours and parents that DS is some flavour of gifted.

    If I were to define giftedness, I would say that it is an intellectual hunger that cannot be satisfied by ordinary means and, for high LOG, even by extraordinary means. The percentiles a are a mechanical construct that exist because of resource scarcity and budget constraints. smile


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    Originally Posted by Lepa
    While we are on the topic, I have been feeling like I shouldn't really participate in this forum because I do not have a PG child. How do people feel about people with children who are only gifted or HG participating?

    I wouldn't worry about that if I were you.


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    Originally Posted by madeinuk
    Originally Posted by Lepa
    While we are on the topic, I have been feeling like I shouldn't really participate in this forum because I do not have a PG child. How do people feel about people with children who are only gifted or HG participating?

    I wouldn't worry about that if I were you.

    +1


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    Originally Posted by aquinas
    Originally Posted by madeinuk
    Originally Posted by Lepa
    While we are on the topic, I have been feeling like I shouldn't really participate in this forum because I do not have a PG child. How do people feel about people with children who are only gifted or HG participating?

    I wouldn't worry about that if I were you.

    +1

    I don't think your child needs to be PG for this forum. This is more a support group for those whose gifted kids just won't get in the d*** box and stay there. Gifted can be be defined fairly loosely in that context.

    To say in real life my child is PG, the test was wrong, you are elitist for testing and trusting the answers is a different thing.

    Last edited by puffin; 11/28/14 12:37 PM.
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    In medicine and psychology a syndrome is a collection of signs (objective features) and symptoms (subjective features) which suggest a unified disease process even if the cause is not known. (A syndrome in genetics in different).

    Giftedness is like a syndrome in that there is no one single test available to pin down the "cause" giving rise to it so no one test is a perfect identifier for who has it.

    I agree strongly that the difficulty of providing a single definition for the construct of intelligence let alone giftedness is one reason it is hard to advocate.

    This forum does not discriminate on level of giftedness or require proof for admission. The posters here are able to assist with providing advice and support on all aspects arising from giftedness which are so different for every child in every situation.

    I guess my question would be to the OP, do you feel comfortable and supported by the group you have joined? Do the issues or topics discussed appear relevant to you and your child? If so there are positives to be gained from going along.

    I can understand though, that it may be difficult to feel accepted if within that group you can't have a friendly and open discussion about the difficulties of gifted identification. That has certainly been raised many times here.

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    Originally Posted by Lepa
    While we are on the topic, I have been feeling like I shouldn't really participate in this forum because I do not have a PG child. How do people feel about people with children who are only gifted or HG participating?


    Lepa, please do not feel like you shouldn't participate. My DS has been tested privately and by the school and found HG (but 2e) by one and not gifted by the other...a test is just a test and it may find your child's giftedness or it may not- as someone else said it's a snapshot. A lot figures into it, including how old your child is when tested, if they are 2e, if they feel comfortable with the assessor, etc. If you find benefit from what you learn on here, then you need to be here for your child's sake.

    I kind of felt like you a bit as I didn't have children that appeared to need or want acceleration, they weren't reading at two, and my DS not only didn't talk early he actually didn't start talking without intervention via speech therapy. So the types of challenges we have are different. But I really have found my tribe here and I have also found that the people with the "poster child" gifted kids are very supportive and have great advice even if their children's giftedness appears differently than mine.

    The support you get here does tend to be pretty gifted (or suspected gifted) specific. I really don't think most people would end up here if their kids are not gifted (regardless of testing).

    We need to stick together, it's a long strange road we are privileged to travel on with our kids. Our roads will look a little different based on what our children need, but it certainly doesn't mean you shouldn't be on this road.


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    I also have un-tested children, although I have documentation of HG+ for myself, and pretty good circumstantial evidence for my spouse. And, of course, I test for a living...but I do think that this forum benefits mainly those who belong here. (So if it benefits you, you belong.)

    Another thought for contemplation: I think there is some value in taking a page from the other end of the bell curve, and combining measures of cognition with levels of need. On the left hand end of the curve, IQ is necessary but not sufficient (and the cutoff is somewhat flexible) for diagnosis. The other prong, in that case, is adaptive skills, with level of support the critical criterion. So an individual who scores rather low cognitively, yet is able to function independently in life without any modifications or accommodations, would not be considered intellectually impaired (it doesn't impair, you see). Perhaps we can consider levels of need in the right hand tail as well. Those way up in LOG require substantial modifications, to their education certainly, and often to other aspects of their lives, as well, to have their needs met. (Of course, when we throw in 2e, the level of support needed becomes quite a bit more complicated.) I know it's not a perfect parallel, but just something to think about.


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    In acknowledging different "flavors" of gifted, and welcoming a broad range of posters, a parent of a tested-and-found-to-be-PG child ought not to be made to feel badly for their experience of gifted or their support for IQ testing. Schools, psychologists, and researchers are among those who also tend to support testing.

    Many have written that the more inclusive and all-encompassing "gifted" identification becomes, the less well it serves the intellectual outliers who most need different supports, approaches, curriculum, and pacing (and for whom gifted education was ostensibly created).

    Unfortunately, the same may be true of some forums. This TED talk on "filter bubbles" may serve as a reminder to be open to various perspectives... including the parent of the tested-and-found-to-be-PG child... so they may also feel welcome.

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