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    #197159 - 07/25/14 05:39 AM Any non-gifted parents raising HG+ child?
    cammom Offline
    Member

    Registered: 07/11/13
    Posts: 299
    I'm asking this question because sometimes I feel overwhelmed by DS7's passions and his behavior.
    My DH and I are finding that it's not only DS's intellect that is different- he is just different. Obsessive interests, highly emotional, willing to question out authority or just asking complicated questions all. day. long. I finally suggested that he keep a special notebook for questions so that they didn't get lost- that way, I can use google or a science book to answer.
    Currently, he's memorizing the periodic table and has completed most of elementary school math with an average of 45 minutes *per week* of enrichment from me.
    In the day to day of our lives, I take DS as he is- I just notice the differences when he becomes "passionately" interested in a topic. At seven, I was running through nature and my husband was playing with star wars action figures- not memorizing the periodic table, or obsessing about weather/science, or reading non fiction for fun.
    DS doesn't even fall into the category of PG- I could not imagine. Parents talk about their kids' giftedness and their own- my case is different. Neither my husband or I were identified as gifted-we've done well in life, but speaking only for myself, if I'm gifted it's on the moderate end. Anyway, just needed to get it out. Cheers.

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    #197161 - 07/25/14 05:49 AM Re: Any non-gifted parents raising HG+ child? [Re: cammom]
    OrlFamily Offline
    Junior Member

    Registered: 05/16/14
    Posts: 39
    My kids are so much smarter than me! I'm probably gifted somewhat (as in a spike in one area). I forget things, it takes me time to figure things out - our DS gets so frustrated when I try to help him with his math (he usually ends up helping me). I suspect our DD is as gifted as he is (hasn't been tested yet) and I do wonder where they got their abilities!

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    #197163 - 07/25/14 06:04 AM Re: Any non-gifted parents raising HG+ child? [Re: cammom]
    cammom Offline
    Member

    Registered: 07/11/13
    Posts: 299
    My DS will solve a math problem quickly in his head and for awhile I assumed that it "couldn't" be correct because he did it "too" fast. We have had this embarrassing exchange a few times:

    Me: that's incorrect
    Him: it's right
    Me: no it's not (thinking hard)
    Me: yes it is
    Me: sorry
    Him: it's okay

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    #197172 - 07/25/14 07:49 AM Re: Any non-gifted parents raising HG+ child? [Re: cammom]
    Dude Offline
    Member

    Registered: 10/04/11
    Posts: 2856
    If my wife and my mom were on this forum, they'd both be posting in this thread, and as I've learned more about the nature of giftedness, I've spotted huge red flags in both of them that strongly suggest they significantly underrate their own abilities. It's too late to talk to my mom about it, but DW is finally starting to come around to the idea that she's not as dumb as she thinks she is.

    Maybe y'all are smarter than you realize, too.

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    #197174 - 07/25/14 08:15 AM Re: Any non-gifted parents raising HG+ child? [Re: Dude]
    JonLaw Offline
    Member

    Registered: 07/29/11
    Posts: 2007
    Loc: The Sub-Tropics
    Originally Posted By: Dude
    If my wife and my mom were on this forum, they'd both be posting in this thread, and as I've learned more about the nature of giftedness, I've spotted huge red flags in both of them that strongly suggest they significantly underrate their own abilities. It's too late to talk to my mom about it, but DW is finally starting to come around to the idea that she's not as dumb as she thinks she is.

    Maybe y'all are smarter than you realize, too.


    Unless you are my father.

    Then you aren't as smart as you think you are.

    I've spotted significant red flags that he significantly overrates his own abilities.

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    #197178 - 07/25/14 09:30 AM Re: Any non-gifted parents raising HG+ child? [Re: cammom]
    HowlerKarma Offline
    Member

    Registered: 02/05/11
    Posts: 5181
    Originally Posted By: cammom
    My DS will solve a math problem quickly in his head and for awhile I assumed that it "couldn't" be correct because he did it "too" fast. We have had this embarrassing exchange a few times:

    Me: that's incorrect
    Him: it's right
    Me: no it's not (thinking hard)
    Me: yes it is
    Me: sorry
    Him: it's okay



    I can point to several times when my DH has had this conversation with DD-- including some fairly HEATED exchanges when she was 9-10yo. He was making a sign error or something in HIS head, and SHE wasn't-- and he assumed (with his PhD) that he had to be right, and she had to be wrong, since she was showing so little of her work.
    blush

    So it's not just "not gifted" parents who run into this set of issues. My DH is HG, and in the high end of the range. I'm EG, and just that difference is enough that I "get" things about my DD's learning and thought process that elude him, or that he thinks of as alien/impossible.

    I can see that she's doing it-- I'm into a close enough range that I know she's really doing what it appears that she's doing, I mean-- but I can't really do it the way SHE does it.

    She's clearly beyond me. It's not just that she's beyond me at her age. She's just... beyond me.

    My mother was NT, and my Dad was PG. (Yeah, that's another story...)

    My mother thought that I was a space alien from the time I was born, basically. She could NOT relate to me. At all. My dad, who was otherwise not that fond of children, found me a delight, and he and I related to one another very well. His areas of expertise were not like mine, however-- he was much more strongly verbal than me, and I have STEM ability that he lacked.
    _________________________
    Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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    #197179 - 07/25/14 09:38 AM Re: Any non-gifted parents raising HG+ child? [Re: HowlerKarma]
    JonLaw Offline
    Member

    Registered: 07/29/11
    Posts: 2007
    Loc: The Sub-Tropics
    Originally Posted By: HowlerKarma
    I can see that she's doing it-- I'm into a close enough range that I know she's really doing what it appears that she's doing, I mean-- but I can't really do it the way SHE does it.

    She's clearly beyond me. It's not just that she's beyond me at her age. She's just... beyond me.


    I use the electron atomic orbital analogy.

    She has more electrons in that particular orbital than you do.

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    #197224 - 07/25/14 08:19 PM Re: Any non-gifted parents raising HG+ child? [Re: cammom]
    Cookie Offline
    Member

    Registered: 05/28/14
    Posts: 599
    Let's see...PG engineer dad....NT mom....two PG brothers. I assume I am mildly gifted....two gifted boys. One PG (school's testing, follow up testing I did showed a bit lower log), the other one tested poorly on the WISC...I say HG/2e.

    Both of them blow me away sometimes, but I manage to keep up.

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    #197275 - 07/27/14 06:47 AM Re: Any non-gifted parents raising HG+ child? [Re: cammom]
    Melessa Offline
    Member

    Registered: 06/11/12
    Posts: 393
    Dh is definitely hg+ with strength in stem area. Ds 3 is very much what I imagine dh was like at that age. However, ds3 has an uncanny sense of humor unlike anyone in our families.

    Ds7 has strong verbal qualities with a variety of interests. Both dh and I think ds7 is beyond us.

    As for me, I'd say I'm mg who has this little trick of memorization.

    It's a wild and crazy household with a lot of intensity, but it's fun!

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    #197283 - 07/27/14 11:51 AM Re: Any non-gifted parents raising HG+ child? [Re: cammom]
    howdy Offline
    Member

    Registered: 10/04/13
    Posts: 279
    Every time I see this question asked around the different forums and facebook pages, I see the same responses. That you, as the parent of a PG child, must also be gifted too. Which is often true, according to research that I have read.

    However, I think that it is also possible that the parent is not gifted, and that is okay too. I think you still can be an excellent parent when that is true.

    Just wanted to put that statement out there, too.

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