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    #185521 - 03/21/14 01:18 PM Re: If your child is gifted with a sport/instrument... [Re: ultramarina]
    HowlerKarma Offline
    Member

    Registered: 02/05/11
    Posts: 5181
    BTW, the really nerdy people drive those kinds of distances to show... RABBITS.

    (Yes, I know someone who does this-- 22hr drive in the winter? 20 to 50 rabbits in cages inside of a minivan... now THAT is crazy.)

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Anyway. Back to various activities.

    For anyone that is into dogging and obedience training, here are some fun things to try in training:

    http://championofmyheart.com/relaxation-protocol-mp3-files/

    This will result in ROCK solid stays for obedience. Even in the face of minor explosions inside the ring, probably. Dogs also love watching their handlers do frankly weird and amusing things while all they have to do is enjoy the show and get fed treats. LOL.

    http://www.clickertraining.com/node/289

    That's instructions for target-training with a 'stick' (a retractible pointer) but other trainers use a "tile" or "spot" target that rests on a surface.

    Clickers are very basic operant conditioning-- it really is just as simple as in Skinner's original constructs. Some HG+ kids will do well to understand what they are doing using behavioral shaping tools. Both of the following give a good overview of clicker methodology.


    http://www.dog-training-excellence.com/dog-clicker-training.html


    http://www.dog-training-excellence.com/target-training-with-a-clicker.html


    The single most pragmatic, useful analogy about clicker training that I have ever heard comes from an expert on the subject, and a border collie trainer/rescue operator. She suggests that trainers/handlers view the clicker as a "camera" that takes snapshots on the "click." When you click, you'll get MORE of what you just took a snapshot of-- so timing is really critical-- only take pictures of your animal doing what you are LOOKING for them to do, particularly if you are free shaping a new behavior.

    One really awesome thing about this kind of dogging is that ANY dog can now be entered into AKC events with a companion registry-- and you can train in tiny amounts of time, really-- a few minutes here and there. Yes, it adds up-- but it is seldom a ton of time at ONCE, so it fits nicely around other activities and commitments.
    _________________________
    Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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    #185523 - 03/21/14 01:22 PM Re: If your child is gifted with a sport/instrument... [Re: ultramarina]
    HowlerKarma Offline
    Member

    Registered: 02/05/11
    Posts: 5181
    Originally Posted By: ultramarina
    DS is actually naturally athletic so in his case, it's not an thing where he should so sports to be, you know, sort of humbled. (I don't mean to sound flippant. I get it.) But I just can't commit to both chess and sports at the same time. However, he might just enjoy sports just as much. We really probably need to give it a whirl. That does factor in...

    Quote:
    FWIW, I think if ultramarina's son were mine, I'd allow him to do the amount of chess he's asking for to the extent that its impact on other family members was acceptable, but I'd try really, really hard not to get invested in his success myself, and not to assume he'd want to do X this year because he was doing it last year - make sure the way is clear for other interests to rise up if they will.


    I thought I wasn't invested, but I came to see pretty quickly how that happens. It was the coaches freaking out over him that got us invested! The second tournament, where he didn't do very well and got upset, was a good wake-up call for me. He needs to have fun doing this and we need to keep an eye on the whole thing for everyone. At this point I think I've readjusted my attitude. But, and this is important, I don't think DS has. Much has been made of him by friends, coaches, and family members (I don't mean me as much as grandparents). That has also been annoying for DD10, though some of this is just, you know, life with siblings and it happens. For these reasons, I have some interest in tamping down the whole thing.

    But, see, he loves it. He's been crying about not having chess club over the summer.


    I have mixed feelings about not being willing to allow DD to commit to piano like that back when she expressed interest in doing so.

    She's lost that passion for it, now, but there was a time when she was experiencing that. We felt that it was just too young to specialize and close off other possible pursuits without even exploring them.

    I don't know if we did the right thing, honestly. frown
    _________________________
    Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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    #185524 - 03/21/14 01:31 PM Re: If your child is gifted with a sport/instrument... [Re: ultramarina]
    DeHe Offline
    Member

    Registered: 08/07/10
    Posts: 735
    UM,
    My DS isn't into anything like this and we have to drag him to physical activities and insist on them or else he would be a puddle of goo on the floor, but, we live in a chess intensive area and have seen much. I would second Colin's mum, and your own instinct here about it being fun for him - my DS had a brilliant chess kid in his K class, older brother played and the trips to nationals and regionals were big family outings. The kid hated it - he was brilliant at it - but hated it - the kid is no longer at DS's school - but his brother, who got much less attention for his chess, is still doing quite well and placing statewide - the younger is nowhere to be found. Refusing to play, throwing fits. So I would say that his interest and willingness to be coached is a good sign of passion. Now, you still have to balance allocations of family resources, family time, and physically activity. But I think you are on the good side of things focusing on happiness, so long as nothing else is being dropped.

    DeHe

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    #185527 - 03/21/14 01:36 PM Re: If your child is gifted with a sport/instrument... [Re: ultramarina]
    ultramarina Offline
    Member

    Registered: 08/24/10
    Posts: 3428
    Oy, HK--you're not helping!

    Yeah, see. We're right there with it. DS is placing right below the top tier for his age, and where we live is very competitive for chess. If he wants to go to the next level, he needs to get a coach, etc. Note that I don't THINK, at this point, that he is a major big-deal chess wunderkind. I think he's gifted in it and is going to do well for his team and school, but not be top 100 for his age or anything. I am a chess dolt, though. This is speculation.

    But, I mean, it is CHESS. Some part of me feels like it's a bit...I dunno. I would take an instrument a little more seriously, I think? I guess my own snobbery/preference is showing.


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    #185528 - 03/21/14 01:48 PM Re: If your child is gifted with a sport/instrument... [Re: ultramarina]
    HowlerKarma Offline
    Member

    Registered: 02/05/11
    Posts: 5181
    I know exactly what you mean. It was the same feeling that we got re: the classical musical, er... 'regimen.'
    _________________________
    Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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    #185533 - 03/21/14 02:28 PM Re: If your child is gifted with a sport/instrument... [Re: ultramarina]
    ColinsMum Offline
    Member

    Registered: 09/19/08
    Posts: 1898
    Loc: Scotland
    IKWYM too. I consciously didn't encourage DS to get serious about chess (not encouraging his programming, either) but do encourage music and maths.

    But... mine was never that wild about chess anyway, and yours is.

    Does it help to think of a decision, either way, being just for the next six months or year, and put a date in the diary to reconsider?
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    #185538 - 03/21/14 03:22 PM Re: If your child is gifted with a sport/instrument... [Re: ultramarina]
    GF2 Offline
    Member

    Registered: 02/13/14
    Posts: 74
    Yes, binip, we homeschool. :-)

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    #185541 - 03/21/14 03:42 PM Re: If your child is gifted with a sport/instrument... [Re: ultramarina]
    binip Offline
    Member

    Registered: 03/10/14
    Posts: 96
    Thank you for replying. I feel much less inadequate now. How great that your kid can have those in-depth experiences.

    *Edited to say... not because I feel homeschooling is inadequate, but because the level of organization required to do institutional schooling AND all those activities is so beyond me I couldn't even fathom it.


    Edited by binip (03/21/14 03:43 PM)

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    #185543 - 03/21/14 04:05 PM Re: If your child is gifted with a sport/instrument... [Re: ultramarina]
    KnittingMama Offline
    Member

    Registered: 04/04/12
    Posts: 267
    Loc: California
    Wow, this thread makes me feel so...inadequate! DD and DS each have two activities they're doing this spring, and that adds up to only a few hours a week total; DD occasionally asks to add dance or gymnastics, but she also really enjoys being at home after school and not having to go anywhere.

    Not helpful to the OP (sorry @ultramarina!), but encouraging me to try pushing our family a little bit. Maybe we'll try adding something and see how it goes. (Of course it would help if they were interested in the *same* activities, but that doesn't seem likely.)

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    #185544 - 03/21/14 04:59 PM Re: If your child is gifted with a sport/instrument... [Re: ultramarina]
    ultramarina Offline
    Member

    Registered: 08/24/10
    Posts: 3428
    I don't think there's any reason to push it, though! DD10 isn't and hasn't been interested in specializing like this--she really values free time to putter around, hang out, play in the yard, and pursue her own creative stuff, most of which goes unfinished--so that's part of why this is foreign to me.

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