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    #184871 - 03/14/14 11:03 AM Re: School didn't acknowledge child [Re: cee]
    nicoledad Offline

    Registered: 05/26/12
    Posts: 235
    I think part of the difference is the change of schools and guessing more kids at the junior high. I think acknowledgement is different at a younger level. A funny (at least to me)story is my daughter is in 6th grade There was a parents get together at her future junior high. All the different departments heads were there. Afterwards if you had any questions you could talk to them. Guess which head had the longest line waiting to speak to him? The head of PE. Had no problem getting a chance to talk to the Math head.

    #184879 - 03/14/14 11:54 AM Re: School didn't acknowledge child [Re: ColinsMum]
    binip Offline

    Registered: 03/10/14
    Posts: 96
    From my perspective, it's not the school's job to make our kids feel good about themselves. They are there to provide a challenging environment and give children objective, normed feedback about their performance (how well are you doing compared to standards and your peers).

    So I wouldn't write, because I don't agree that the school ought

    "They were congratulated in morning announcements, and given certificates by principal."

    That is unheard of here. Even in first grade, there is only one chance to get a certificate, and that's at the end of the year if you complete activities worth approximately 40-50 hours worth of work and several challenges (effort based, so everyone has to work equally hard, but you can start from any point--I love this part of it).

    "From what he says, he seems to feel unvalued by the school, and that his achievement doesn’t matter to them."

    It probably doesn't. He's special to his own family but not to the school. The school provides him with a service, and as far as I know that doesn't include making him feel proud. Pride is something you get from doing the right thing and overcoming adversity or challenging yourself, not from praise.

    I agree with the others--this is a good lesson in finding intrinsic motivation and working on self-esteem that comes from accomplishment and not praise.

    Edited by binip (03/14/14 11:55 AM)

    #184883 - 03/14/14 12:02 PM Re: School didn't acknowledge child [Re: binip]
    nicoledad Offline

    Registered: 05/26/12
    Posts: 235
    I understand what you are saying but it should be done that way across the board. The cross country team for example should not be acknowledged. It sounds like things at this person school were acknowledged based on popularity.

    #184888 - 03/14/14 12:17 PM Re: School didn't acknowledge child [Re: nicoledad]
    puffin Offline

    Registered: 12/11/12
    Posts: 2035
    If they routinely acknowledge other stuff the odds are they just aren't aware and/or the kids in other activities have pushier parents. Our school gives lots of awards - sometimes too many I think.

    #184889 - 03/14/14 12:24 PM Re: School didn't acknowledge child [Re: puffin]
    nicoledad Offline

    Registered: 05/26/12
    Posts: 235
    IMO anything related to school and/or school district they should be aware of.

    #184892 - 03/14/14 12:56 PM Re: School didn't acknowledge child [Re: cee]
    cee Offline

    Registered: 01/30/14
    Posts: 74
    Thanks for feedback everyone. I know it's not the school's job to make them feel good, but if the orchestra teacher gave him the nomination paperwork, and the sheet music, then the school IS involved. Like I said, these regional orchestras bring together the best kids from the area, all from the public/private schools they represent.

    It's just a little disappointing, I guess, and agree it's a learning experience, that sometimes we will do our best, and achieve success, but not be recognized by certain people you think would notice. Agree 100% that motivation should be intrinsic, which you want to see begin to happen as children get older. Emotional learning :-)

    #184896 - 03/14/14 01:16 PM Re: School didn't acknowledge child [Re: cee]
    knute974 Offline

    Registered: 09/22/09
    Posts: 683
    Loc: controlled chaos
    At our middle school, the band and orchestra directors make a point of acknowledging kids who get into all-county and other honor bands that they have to do paperwork for. They just put in a brief mention in the online newsletter. The kids also get acknowledged at the end of year school awards ceremony. No acknoweldgement for anything outside of the school even if it is more prestigious.

    I have a kid who is extremely proficient at her instrument and loves to perform. She would rather die than perform in front of a bunch of her middle school peers at some kind of assembly that they have been forced to attend. She understands that most kids at her school outside of the band/orchestra program have no interest in hearing that type of music. I'd be cautious about encouraging a performance before the school. I could see it backfiring if the kids are not respectful/paying attention.

    #184898 - 03/14/14 01:24 PM Re: School didn't acknowledge child [Re: cee]
    geofizz Offline

    Registered: 12/06/10
    Posts: 658
    I have successfully affected change by asking the principal to acknowledge the winners of the spelling bee. My kids didn't participate at all and I had zero involvement with it, but I explained that it was important to acknowledge such achievements and show they are valued. He clearly got the hint, and now all such accomplishments they know about are applauded.

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