Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Limited GT school options. Getting frustrated...

My son is currently in 3rd grade at a private school. The school is fine, actually very good, but I don't think my son's needs are being met. I think he's getting bored. He has said many times this year that he's learned nothing in class, and that he only learns outside of school. I've asked the principal and teacher about moving him to a higher grade for specific subjects, but the school isn't really cooperating. His teacher sent him to the 7th grade class for science one day (where he was extremely engaged and answered most of the questions the teacher asked her students), but it was basically a random visit.
He needs more than what he's getting.

He has a hard time focussing in class, but I think that's mostly attributable to the fact that he isn't being challenged. He has been diagnosed with ADD, but he loves learning so much that when he sees something new, it really isn't a factor.

We do have a gifted and talented school in our district, but I just learned that enrollment is based on a lottery system for gifted kids, and a large percentage of the school (40%) is only open to neighborhood kids in a separate lottery system.
It looks unlikely that he will get in to this "gifted" school, and the rest of the public schools in the district are not ideal. The test scores in the district are among the lowest in the state. I cant see my son getting a better education at his neighborhood public school than he does at his current school.

I'm frustrated that my son needs to be learning at a higher level than his school is willing/able to provide, but there are no solid options for him.

There is one school his doctor recommended for him, but it is far too expensive for us to afford. There are scholarships to this expensive private school, but they aren't available until 6th grade.

I'm sorry to say, "Welcome to the club". In fact, your experiences actually sound more fortunate than those shared by many families. For decades parents have been evaluating schools, providing feedback, and cobbling together an education for their childrens' needs, often in an unwelcoming atmosphere.

Many gifted kiddos are homeschooled for at least a portion of their academic careers. There are many curriculum resources shared on the gifted forums.

There are also many advocacy tips, approaches, and resources on gifted forums. Because you mention your school has at least experimented with your sons' placement in a class with higher grade level curriculum, you may wish to invest time in researching these approaches and make a checklist to follow, requesting a meeting with a team at the school when your sons needs are clear, you have specific goals in mind, and you have evidence to advocate for them.

Many families have found that requesting "more" from a school did not lead to creative solutions, but showing a body of evidence regarding needs and goals can be more effective in partnering for change.

Sorry to hear your struggle. But as indigo said, this is really quite common. We are in a highly regarded district, our school's test scores are among the best in the state. And my kids still don't get challenged. My DD8 is doing very well at school just because she is willing to go with the flow and try to have fun no matter what. My DS13 has had a very tough experience at school ever since 2nd grade. He is now in a private school, which is still not what we were hoping for. We do a lot of activities at home. Both kids would tell you that most of their learning happens outside of school. In the first couple of years of DS's schooling I was misguided and really thought that working with teachers and the school was the best. Later on I was completely disillusioned and realized that it's really up to the parents to provide what the kids need. I know a lot of parents who think this way: whether or not a kid is labelled gifted, it's difficult to find accommodation at school for academic levels or learning styles that are way different from the mean. There are definitely success stories. But those seem to be the lucky ones, not something that we can *expect*.