Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Gifted but with other problems

Here is a quick read about ADHD, as another poster mentioned that possibility:
WebMD, 2 pages - http://www.webmd.com/add-adhd/guide/adhd-symptoms
You will find more links.

Might he enjoying drawing pictures to be his reminders?

What a wonderful arrangement! This may give him lots of choices for what he likes best, to keep in a portfolio, as the works retire from being exhibited on the walls of his art studio.


That may be something to keep in a written log.


What may be eccentric to one person may be a disability to another. It is a matter of degree, ability to function.


Reading your school's gifted policies, special ed policies, and wrightslaw may help shed some light on this. Meanwhile other recent threads have discussed finding testers... some lists include the Hoagies Gifted Education Page (links- http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/psychologists.htm, http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/professionals.htm) and National Association for Gifted Children (NAGC) and its State Affiliates which may offer a list of testers in your area. The sooner he may be tested, the sooner he may feel better.

IMO your child's struggles need the help of someone who can perform a neuropsych eval and who understands giftedness. Tapping into your local GT community might reveal suggestions about who would be a good clinician to provide help. A lot of what you write is stuff I experienced with my son, who is gifted and was also diagnosed with ADHD. Please know the psychologist who tested him did not wish to diagnose AD/HD (gifted kids can compensate so well!) and referred him to a neuropsych for eval. I should have followed my instinct and just jumped to the neuropsych right away and saved that initial expense. A neuropsych can diagnose things other than AD/HD, in case some other type of learning disorder or executive functioning issue is present. What is important, is to seek diagnosis as soon as possible. This is all from my own experiences as a mother who did NOT want to pursue the AD/HD path but wishes I would have done so earlier. Doing it as soon as possible, then treating it properly, can alleviate so many problems caused by the child's behaviors, within the family and outside the family. Has a parent or relative been diagnosed with AD/HD? That could be a clue that possibly your child has it as well. Hope this helps....

Thank you all so much for your advice.. it has been very helpful

Welcome to the group CrazyMom2013. You've already gotten quite a bit of great advice, so I don't have much more to add. I'll second (*strong* second) that from what you've written, a neuropsych eval is something I would seriously consider. Your sweet ds is having some type of struggle, but the symptoms and behaviors you've written about could be *anything* really - there are so many challenges that overlap - some have mentioned ADHD, there was a mention of NVLD, the disorganization you mentioned was a *huge* issue for my ds for many years, and his diagnosis is Developmental Coordination Disorder. A neuropysch will help pull apart the different pieces of the puzzle, you'll come away with a better understanding of what's *really* going on, and you will be given a bit of a roadmap to move forward on re therapies, accommodations, etc if they are needed.


Also, just fwiw, there's no doubt you have a very very smart young son, and 138 is a high score on an IQ test - but IQ tests aren't tests that people have to have life experience under their belts to do well on - an IQ test isn't a "pass-fail" kind of thing or something that a person can really prep and study for to get a higher score on the actual questions asked. It does sometimes help to be a bit older so issues of maturity don't creep in, such as a child not caring about finishing or answering, or a child becoming overly tired etc while testing. And it's possible that perhaps the test used wasn't an innate ability IQ test (?) but perhaps either a learned ability test or more of an achievement test.

I hope you're able to find some answers for your ds - it sounds like you both need some help. As the parent of two 2e kids, I also know how easy it is to get used to the way things work within your family that you don't realize how different it is from what is typical. Having to put signs up as reminders everywhere at home isn't typical - neither are the behavior issues at school. It's so easy to pass off things that are signs of a challenge as the quirks of being gifted - but this sounds like more than quirky gifted asynchronicity. If there is more to it than that, you'll be glad you took the time to really understand what is going on.

The last thing I'll add - 2nd/3rd grade is a really common time in school for kids who are 2e and were holding things together to suddenly fall apart as the demands of school increase. While part of the issue may be a teacher who doesn't really understand your son, the teacher may also be providing you with some important clues into what's going on, so be sure to listen to what the teacher has to say even if you think she's way off base... we were in a similar situation with a teacher when our 2e ds was in 2nd grade and it was *horrible* - the teacher did not understand him or what was up with him, but neither did we as parents see that there was anything other than gifted perfectionist underchallenged kid in a classroom that wasn't a good fit. So we spent a lot of time discounting what the teacher had to say - and no, she didn't see what the real issue was, but in hindsight, she was absolutely spot-on correct that our ds was not functioning in his classroom and that there was an issue we needed to address. It took a neuropsych consult to figure it all out.

Best wishes,

polarbear

@Polar bear.. Thanks for the info! Also when I say pass.. he had to get a certain score to get into the gifted program, so maybe I used the term incorrectly. I didn't ask for my son to be in the program, his teacher did. When they were going over with me everything before the test, they warned me that Kindergartners don't have the life experiences required to take an IQ test, but that if he didn't score high they would test him again in first.. he scored 138- I don't know anything about the test.. that is only what I was told by the people that gave him the test. I never saw the test itself..