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    #13676 - 04/13/08 05:18 AM Re: Gifted personality question- help [Re: master of none]
    Lorel Offline

    Registered: 08/22/07
    Posts: 970
    Loc: New England

    I'm glad that your son is no longer suffering from SM. I haven't done any research into the condition, but it is interesting to me that every one of the kids I have heard of with this has been gifted. I know of four different kids (all girls) who have been diagnosed. I would say that I am definitely exposed to more gifted kids than the average person, but I also see and hear about many more typical kids each day.

    #13778 - 04/14/08 12:47 PM Re: Gifted personality question- help [Re: mosaicmama]
    mosaicmama Offline
    Junior Member

    Registered: 04/11/08
    Posts: 2

    Thank you so much for the input. This is all so very interesting to me. I have always known that my daughter was different than other kids her age, but I had no idea that giftedness encompassed so many personality ‘quirks’. It’s like it takes all these facets of her personality that seem unrelated and calls it something. It makes a lot of sense to me. She is definitely advanced academically for her age, nothing extreme though. The personality characteristics of gifted children describe her perfectly. My motivation to get her into a different classroom setting would be to make sure that she is challenged academically and to get her somewhere where the kids and teacher ‘get’ her. She does have selective mutism, so how could she be tested? It is my understanding that she would need to answer questions and she is very frozen when she is required to answer direct questions. I believe her fear of being wrong stops her. With us she feels much freer to be imperfect. Does anyone have advice for testing in this situation?

    #13780 - 04/14/08 02:22 PM Re: Gifted personality question- help [Re: mosaicmama]
    Cathy A Offline

    Registered: 05/26/07
    Posts: 1783
    Loc: West coast, USA
    I know of someone who had a private psychologist come to her home to test her child. Do you think that could work?

    #13787 - 04/14/08 04:22 PM Re: Gifted personality question- help [Re: Cathy A]
    snowgirl Offline

    Registered: 02/24/08
    Posts: 361
    I like Cathy's idea a whole lot.

    I was pleased with our experience at the Gifted Development Center, where we had DD tested last year (she was 6 at the time; they're the ones who said she was one of the most introverted kids they had ever tested). I knew she was shy but had no idea it was that extreme (since I was/am the same way lol). After spending a good deal of time warming up, DD ended up giving most of her answers through a stuffed animal, a bunny that happened to be there. This testing place prides itself on being able to get such kids to reveal what they know.

    So I guess my advice would be to concentrate on finding the right tester - that can make all the difference. And then of course discuss the SM issue before you even agree to have them do the testing. I'm not sure, beyond simply calling around and asking the testers' questions, how you find the right one. Good luck finding that exact right person!!

    p.s. as an update on my DS5 - he just started weekly OT with a "motor group", a very small group of kids and the therapist, and for the second week in a row he sat by the door and did nothing but observe. This is in spite of the fact that I promised him he didn't even have to talk to her, he just had to do what she said. I'm so frustrated, since getting him there is a logistical pain in the rear, and it's all for nothing.

    #13858 - 04/15/08 06:59 PM Re: Gifted personality question- help [Re: snowgirl]
    Grinity Offline

    Registered: 12/13/05
    Posts: 7207
    Loc: Connecticut
    Mosiac Mama,
    I don't know if you can find a tester who will come to the house, but that could be key. In the meantime you can use the Ruff estimated levels and see if that gets you anywhere - don't use them to determine that she isn't gifted, just to support your hypothesis if she does have that particular set of experiences.

    I would try to invite a gifted high schooler to come over for a visit (pay her as a 'mother's helper - don't leave the house, just try to get some paperwork done.') See if DD talks to her or treats her as a teacher. You can also try afterschooling with DD, nothing 'proves' giftedness than a child enjoying material that is a few grades above the readiness level of her agemates.

    You can also try to arrange playdates with other gifted children - there are tales of very very shy kids snaping right out of their shells when they finally met other gifted kids.

    Best Wishes,
    Coaching available, at

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