Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Head + Wall $^^#& School!!!

*deep breath* This is going to be rather ranty...

So Bear(5) is unofficially attending the local special ed preschool once a week for about two hours. At first it was just for social skills and he did wonderfully so we added in staying to do school work. He's.... managing. There is oppositional behavior and non-compliance, but no tantrums at school and he has managed to complete something both days he's gone so far. He's a handful for the next 36 hours after school though.

He is in line to get into a two day a week charter/homeschool mix program. Problem is it's full, both of them. Also they are now saying that he might not be allowed to attend if he isn't potty trained even if I'm willing to act as his aid. The other options are half day K (they'd call me and I'd have to go to the school to change him and it's an every day program), a very unschooling based charter school whose little kids' class is always full so new kids don't have a chance to get into it and another charter that gives you money and a supervisor, but no social groups or anything like that.

Bear NEEDS classroom structure (he's thriving at the special ed PK beyond refusing to do work), but he can't take it in large doses every day. Kids with a diagnosis get to wear diapers to school and have an aid to change them. Since he's not bad off enough to have a diagnosis beyond sensory processing disorder and anxiety (he has enough check marks to just BARELY not qualify for a handful of other disorders that would "count" with the district) and he didn't qualify for an IEP, we are SOL.

I really have no idea what to do if the program is full and/or he can't be in diapers. I mean he will be 5 1/2 and in diapers. Shouldn't that count as a special need, especially if it might be linked to the SPD? Argh...

Wyldkat, do you have a children's hospital nearby? Ours has a bowel clinic equipped with a psychologist who specializes in potty training. For kids over 5, it's apporpriate to seek this kind of help, in case there's a physical reason going on and to get some support for you.

The IEP is based on "educational and functional" needs, not diagnosis; he could qualify under "other health impaired," and it does sound like his participation at school is seriously impaired. In your shoes, I would pursue reopening the case and getting the IEP.

DeeDee

Don't know where you are located, but I have experience with CHOP and Cincinnati Children's and they were both helpful. I strongly agree that professional help in this area is appropriate for a child over 5.

Wyldkat, have you had the help of a parent advocate when trying to get an IEP or 504 plan in place at school? If not, they can be extremely helpful in that they are familiar with your specific state law and how to navigate your local schools. There are advocates who are available free of charge in some areas - we found our local resource groups through the yellow pages link at www.wrightslaw.org - and it was *extremely* helpful to me to have an advocate to ask questions of re school district policy, getting advice re what I seeking reasonable, and for advice on how to wordsmith requests to the school + how to respond to walls put up by the school.

I am certain that in our school district you would at least have a health plan in place to cover your ds' needs for diaper changes during the day.

I'm also curious if your ds has been evaluated privately or if the evaluations you've had are limited to school district evaluations - if they have been through the school district, that may be the reason you've been told that he doesn't qualify for a diagnosis, and a private evaluation might be much more helpful.

Plus I'll second the suggestion for a medical look at what's up too.

Best wishes,

polarbear