Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Sensitivity and Giftedness

If you're gifted and sensitive to social issues, how do you manage the feelings? How do you separate yourself from the pain and feelings of helplessness when your efforts don't produce results in making a difference?

Did anti-depressant medication help? What other way of coping was found?

I'm asking for an adult and for a child.

I'm not the kind of person who often seeks out advice from teachers, professors, or bosses, but I remember going to see my faculty advisor in my last semester of college. He was holding his office hours out at the edge of the plateau because he had signed up to count migrating hawks. I almost never went to see professors in their offices, but I went to see him out there.

I was thinking about going into the Peace Corps, and I knew he had done it. I'd studied just enough to know that sometimes programs with good intentions had negative impacts on the lives of people they were trying to help.

My professor said, "I don't know if you'll find this comforting or terrifying, but you can't really change much of anything."

Well, it's important to keep your life in balance. For instance, I'm a teacher, and you've just described my job. We have to recognize that we have very little control over our students' lives.

We have to recognize that being a good teacher means holding onto our sanity, and that means we have to have something going on in our lives besides work. That may be part of why so many teachers do continuing education, whether or not they earn more money for the extra degrees. Exercise is pretty crucial to that endeavor as well, and if it's out in nature some kind of way, even better!

I've never sought medication for depression, but I have plenty of friends who have.

If you haven't read up on Dabrowski's notion of Emotional Overexcitabilities (though gifted folks usually have a set of OEs, not just one), you should do that. _Living with Intensity_ is a good book if you want to get really into it, but there are quite a bit of articles on the web.

"Self-development is a higher duty than self-sacrifice." -Elizabeth Cady Stanton

You might consider reading this article.

http://www.davidsongifted.org/db/Articles_id_10269.aspx

Dr. Webb is very highly respected. Also the organization SENG is very supportive of the emotional aspects of giftedness, they have alot of resources over there. The link to their site looks like it is in this article.

This would be a good time to think about the circle of concern vs. the circle of influence with respect to the Seven Habits of Highly Effective people.

I tend to fall back on the Serenity Prayer... and I'm not even religious.

You might point out this book and see if it applies.
http://www.hsperson.com/pages/hsp.htm

There's that popular story about the little girl throwing starfish back into the ocean after a hurricane.  When she was told to quit, there were too many, she couldn't make a difference.  She continued, saying, "I can't save them all.  But it mattered at least to that one."
Practice random acts of kindness and senseless beauty.

The problem with teaching is that the starfish talk back and call you names! ; )

Hi everyone. Beckee, I have to happily disagree with your professor :-)


"My professor said, "I don't know if you'll find this comforting or terrifying, but you can't really change much of anything." "

I can think of sooooooo many inspirational people who really have made significant changes for good! Huge changes. Plus, I have always loved the starfish story (we can still feel good about the things we do that might appear to have a smaller scale positive impact, but positive nonetheless).

You also said, "I'm a teacher, and you've just described my job. We have to recognize that we have very little control over our students' lives. " It is hard to not have total control to improve students' lives, but teachers sure can make an impact!!! You are lucky to be in a position where you can inspire young people.

But to our original poster, I do suggest you google the starfish story. It has been beautifully told, and I think is truly inspirational and helps address your question! Cheers to all of you!

Thank you.

loren eiseley