Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Dev Behavior appt tomorrow-tell IQ or wait?

I'm really nervous about our (FINALLY) appointment with the Developmental Behavior clinic tomorrow...the pediatrician referred us because she wants to hang the ADHD label on my child but, besides the fact that I would never accept that from just the ped and HELL YES I would like a second opinion before you suggest I should give my child controlled substances (we hardly even take aspirin in this house), I'm worried about whether or not this psychologist will take giftedness into account. I already heard the school psychologist tell me a kid CAN'T be gifted AND learning disabled (ugh!)...this is a big difference...is she just gifted and quirky? does she really have something (ADHD or other) that we DO need to address?
My biggest problem is when you look at traits of giftedness vs ADHD and see how many things line up. She's already had IQ and Acheivment assessments and the private psychologist said she didn't see any clear cut ADHD, but some things that could just be reaction to the previous bad classroom. And, of course, I have no idea what is "normal" or "average" lol!
I'm worried that this dr is going to want to call her ADHD too without really doing his due diligence and I'm not sure if I should bring up herr IQ or what the other psychologist said first or if I should just try to be quiet and see what he says first...

advice? 2 cents? tia!

Whether or not the Dr comes up with ADHD or not will most likely depend on what YOU tell him. So I wouldn't worry too much. You will absolutely have the opportunity to tell the Dr exactly what YOU think the problem is, and how you feel about meds.

1. Don't panic.

2. I think you should give them all the information you already have (including written reports), let them know what the strengths and problems of your DD are, the whole picture, and let them evaluate. You want them to be thorough and fair-- withholding information is only going to prevent thoroughness.

3. I don't have a problem with "labels" if they accurately describe what's going on. If he makes a diagnosis, you can ask exactly what his reasons are, and ask on until you understand. To determine whether someone has ADHD there are usually parent and teacher questionnaires (lengthy ones) and a whole lot of delving into behavior. It's not something most professionals do lightly.

4. If you don't want to give your DD meds, nobody is able to "make" you do that. You will retain choice in the matter. Meds are the main way that medical science has available at this point for treating ADHD in young children (older kids can compensate more with behavioral strategies), but you don't have to do it that way if you don't want to.

DeeDee

thanks for the advice everyone...

When I say "label" I mean that in the "didn't really do due dilligence and let's just call it this a medicate it so we can get on to the next person" attitude, if that makes any sense at all, lol! We did the Connor's questionaire previously and this is what the ped wanted to base the dx on, even though I tried to tell her, repeatedly that DD had tested 99.6 on the Raven matrices (what they use for GT testing here), she didn't seem to think that was important. I left the peds office that day totally seeing red, shaking, etc. I was mad too because the ped even said DD didn't fit the usual dx, but offered me meds anyway..."You could try them if you want." and yes, we are looking at getting a new ped, btw...

I am worried that he isn't going to listen or isn't going to want to take her "giftedness" into account, but DH assures me I can just get up and walk out then, lol!

We talk about professional behavior, but so far, we have been severely disappointed in most of the so called professionals that we have gone to, trying to help figure things out for DD, so I probably have an abundance of anxiety over the whole thing too...

We took my son to a neuropsychologist when he was 8 to rule out ADHD - not because I thought he had it but because I wanted it part of his psych eval that he did not have it. Had the psychologist come back with ADHD as part of the diagnosis, we would've dealt with it, but he didn't.

It's worth having it ruled in or out so that you're addressing your child's needs - whatever they are.

ABQMom-yes, that's where we are, ruling out...plus I'm hopeful that if this is not the person we need to see, he will send us on to the next doctor, lol! I mean, I think most, if not all, of the posters here have read about the struggles we've had with getting almost anyone to help us, understand, etc. ANd I'm sure alot of people here remember those early days of wading through crap to get something appropriate for your kids...
Even though things are better now that we are homeschooling, we do need to get to the root of a few things going on with her...
Personally, I think it's like the private psych said..."maladaptive ADHD like behavior" from a poor classroom fit, some self esteem issues (math anxiety), maybe some overall anxiety/uncertainty and perfectionism...what she's NOT is AS or autistic or depressed. If there is "something", I'm leaning toward CAPD or she could be just a little jumpy absentminded professor...I guess we'll see...

Ditto to everything DeeDee said. We've been through the "is it ADHD or is it Gifted" with our ds as well as honestly thinking our older dd * must * be ADHD based on her behavior only to find out it was something else all together. Getting another opinion isn't the end-all any more than getting a diagnosis makes everything suddenly resolve. The one thing I would wonder re your dd is that if she was suspected of having ADHD based on a Connors questionnaire - I wouldnt think that gifted behaviors would look like ADHD on Connors.... But I'm not anywhere near qualified to have an opinion on that!

Good luck tomorrow -I hope you are able to get a better understanding of what's up.

polarbear

The Conner's has questions like "Does your child learn the same way that other children do?" that any parent of an hg/pg child could honestly answer "no" to, and others that deal with things like peer relationships that could easily be disrupted if there is a poor match between classroom placement and intellectual level, but without having that answer necessarily be an indicator of any pathology. When I filled out the Conner's for my son's evaluation, I explained nearly every answer I gave to give specific examples of the kinds of behaviors and issues that made me rank things the way I did. I'm sure the psych was ready to duct tape my mouth shut by the time we got through it, but it was helpful to her in the end, and led her (along with the pattern of the positive items, which were heavily concentrated in areas such as peer relations) to indicate that although the score indicated a very high probability of all three subtypes of ADHD (inattentive, impulsive,and mixed), his issues were likely not related to ADHD but to his giftedness and his Asperger's Syndrome.

Short version of the above: how can you hope to get anything out of this appointment without providing accurate data to the person assessing your daughter?

Get a full copy of the cognitive + achievement testing to the clinician. They should be able to take it into account without further probing from you. If they seem completely clueless, hand them a copy of Misdiagnosis/Dual Diagnosis?

Explaining how your daughter's behavior changed with a better educational fit should be part of the history they will ask for.

Also, caveat a lot of your replies about "normal" behavior with "this is my first child, she is pretty much my benchmark for normal"