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    Joined: Jan 2008
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    Jamie Offline OP
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    Hi again! I posted here not long ago concerning testing my dds and possibly grade skipping the younger into the older child's class.

    Well, now I am back with a new question - I hope you all don't mind my return visit.

    I have read several threads concerning homeschooling so I thought this might be a great place to ask this question.

    First a little background. DD6 is in 1st grade at our public school. She has tested 6th grade for reading and spelling and 3rd grade for math. She attends a gifted pull-out 4x a week for 30 min a day. DD5 is in K at the same school. She tested 6th grade for reading and spelling and 2nd grade for math. She attends the GT pull-out program 1x a week b/c that is all they usually do for K kids.

    We have spoken to the school on numerous occasions concerning subject acceleration, possible grade skips, etc. but we are also considering homeschooling.

    So, now (finally!) to my question. Currently both girls are pretty happy in school and not having major problems. I, however, do foresee the possibility of problems in the future. Would you change your gifted child's schooling situation even if they were pretty happy with their current one? Or would you wait until serious issues developed before making a switch?

    TIA for what I know will be great advice!

    ETA - the change we are considering is taking them out of public school and homeschooling them (as I re-read my post, it didn't seem that I was clear on that :-)

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    cym Offline
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    Hi Jamie,

    There are many questions that arise from your situation--first, why? Is there a reason you're planning to homeschool? Is it because you could do a much better job? Have you consulted DD's? What do they think?

    I guess I wouldn't change a good situation unless it is clearly in the best interest of the kid. If you're changing because you see a problem down the line, let DD finish the year and re-evaluate every 4-6 months (or more often).

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    Jamie Offline OP
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    Hi!

    We will definitely let them finish this school year. We do, however, worry that the school can not continue to accommodate them (especially their reading skills). We worry about the endless hours they will spend doing mindless busywork when I could be engaging them in something useful and challenging at home.

    The early grades have much to offer aside from acadmeics but I can see their enthusiasm for school diminishing each year. I have watched my dd6's excitement dwindle from K to 1st. While I know that all kids lose that initial excitement about school at some point, I do feel that there is very little taking place throughout the day that really peaks their interest or allows them to really think.

    I just wonder if a drastic change to homeschooling is unwarranted if they seem happy. I mean, should my fear of what
    "may" come be enough to make such a change or would we be better off taking it year by year and waiting for that true unhappiness that I fear to set in before making the change?

    I guess I am just deliberating over whether to be proactive on this and just assume public school will not be a good fit for them or wait and be reactive and make the switch if and when school really starts to be a problem.

    So far, we have been offered a grade skip for my DD5 but are choosing not to for several reasons. We are currently working for some single subject acceleration for both girls but are not getting very far with the admin. It seems they really frown on it and think all teachers can adequately differentiate.

    I think , though, that it is rare to find a teacher who can successfully differentiate for a child 5 plus years ahead of the rest of the class.

    I feel like I am all over the place with this but to try and sum it up. Both girls are happy bouncy social little kids who love to just hang out with kids at school. So, right now they enjoy school but down the road..... who knows?

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    acs Offline
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    My DS is a "happy bouncy social" 12 year old. He has been in public school all along without full grade accelerations. He has been very happy there and has lots of friends.

    The schools (elementary and now middle) are nothing special on paper. But each teacher has done whatever she can to keep DS engaged. Accomadating reading is pretty easy as long as they allow kids to read above level books. Some people have run into capping kids' reading, but that has not been a problem for us. In fact, the teachers often are bringing books in from their home libraries because they think DS would like them.

    DS has run for student counsel every year (sometimes successfully, sometimes not). He plays in the orchestra. He is active in the school's Kiwanis program. He was on student newspaper. He dresses up for every day of spirit week. He ran cross country and now he is on the tennis team. He's been known to pinch hit for the cafeteria ladies when they are short staffed. That boy is everywhere and into everything. Frankly, I really think that I would be holding him back socially if we tried to homeschool him! There is no way I could support that kind of social activity.

    I cannot promise you the same kind of experience. But I felt the same panic you are back when I first saw how far DS was several years ago. But we stayed the course, thinking it was only a matter of time before things collapsed. But they did not collapse and he's in middle school now and thriving.

    I think the two keys are that home life is very intellectually stimulating (lots of family discussions, trips, reading together), and that he has never been one to hide his abilities. As a result the teachers push him and respond well when he asks for harder work.

    I hope our sample size of one is helpful to you!

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    acs Offline
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    As I was thinking about my response above, i got to wondering how many people actually have an experience like ours. I certainly don't know, but I do think that boards like this are likely to be a bit biased towards people who have had problems with the school systems because they are the ones who most need support.

    Certainly that isn't why everyone is here, but maybe you are more likely to be here if things aren't going well. So maybe there are a lot of people whose kids are doing fine in public school--we just don't hear about them because they aren't on this board adn they aren't going to see the HG specialists at the same rates as the kids who are not a good fit for school. At least I wonder if that is the case.

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    Ann Offline
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    I'm not sure Acs. However, I would love your situation for DS2. I'd like my (for the most part) "happy bouncy social" 2 year old to be a "happy bouncy social" 12 year old in public school w/o full grade accelerations. Fortunately, I have several more years to worry about other things. DS2 is still taking off his diaper and putting it into sleeping DH's hand.

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    I think your situation is amazing ACS! One thing about my DS is he does not typically show his true ability in a group of non-GT kids nor is he willing to ask for harder work. He does whatever he can to blend. He gets the small amount of "extras" they have in the classroom for the top 5 kids. At the moment, he is happy socially, but that has come and gone several times this year and he verbalizes that he is not learning anything at school. My son is absolutely delighted to homeschool, despite the fact that he has good buddies at school right now.

    Jamie - we are in a very similar situation with our first grader. He is reading around jr. high level, and is capable of math well ahead of grade level (but hasn't been fully assessed here). Our school is very much against skipping and I have the ability to homeschool now, so that is what will likely happen at our house next fall. Can you feel your daughters out to see if that would be something appealing for them? It would be hard to pull a child from school that REALLY wanted to stay. But I'd re-evaluate the situation often if they are going to stay and see if you could talk to the teachers ahead of time. It also might be more appealing to your girls AFTER a summer at home?

    It is nice that they have such a consistent pull out as a break at first grade! We have nothing like that at our school. I do agree on your thoughts on differentiation. They seem to do fairly well at our school with kids reading within 1-2 years of grade level. They do very little for math and don't assess beyond grade level.

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    cym Offline
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    acs, you are lucky. that's what i hope for for my kiddos--good situations like your son's.

    I feel we do a little hybrid--public school, supplemented as needed by on-line and summer courses. I tried to buy Singapore Math online yesterday for DS6 because I don't like his math curriculum at school and thought we could do some this summer together. DS11 & DS13 will both take summer institute courses and just finished online course. DS9 takes an online course, too. My father was just visiting and said, "They should do something fun this summer--not schoolwork" and I tried to convince him that the institutes are more fun than run, jump, skip camp with age-mates. He wasn't convinced. So funny, too, because his daughters never liked to run, jump, skip either.

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    Jamie,

    I think you're an amazing parent to be willing to take the leap to HSing proactively! It's a big, scary change--at least it was for me and for most of the people I know who are now HSing--so to be thinking ahead--regardless of what you decide to do--is just really wonderful. Please pat yourself on the back for me, would you! smile

    I think it is very possible to "see the writing on the wall" and know that something has to change eventually, even if things are fine at school for now. I don't think you have to wait for a serious problem to decide that you can do better in a different school situation. (Not everyone agrees with me on that, BTW. So I may be in the minority with this answer...)

    With girls especially, I think "stealth GT" problems are much harder to ID and can really hamper a GT child's development. "Happy" may really mean "working hard to fit in," and that can lead to problems like underachieving, perfectionism, and depression. I'm not saying these are happening in your children's cases, but I think it is a danger to watch for.

    So I guess I think my answer to your question depends upon what you mean when you say "Currently both girls are pretty happy in school and not having major problems." What constitutes "pretty happy"? What not-major problems are they having, and what would constitute a major problem?

    If the girls truly love their public school and would be miserable without it, then I'd advise you to leave them where they are.

    If "pretty happy" really means "not very happy," they like the idea of homeschooling, and there's an active HSing group in your area, then it might be wise to investigate a bit. You have the time to do some research, and you may find that it is a much better fit for your family than public school. I'd also recommend looking into daytime child care, since if you are even a little bit like me, you will want some time without the kids to think, work, read, run errands, etc. Having that in place early is important!

    I don't think you have to accept "good enough" for your children's education if you can do better than that. But I think you want to be sure that your kids are in favor of the change and that you have the local resources available to make the change a sensible one for you.

    If you have specific questions about HSing itself--what it is, how do get started, etc.--I'd be happy to talk with you about it more in depth. I got lots of help before I made the decision to switch to HSing, so I know how it is and I'm happy to answer any questions you have.

    K-


    Kriston
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    acs Offline
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    I do think that taking the child's desires into consideration is huge. I have checked in with DS a few times on this and he is very clear that he does not want to be homeschooled.

    One of his best friends (who is at least MG) who we share a yard with went to K and then his mother decided she wanted to HS. She was concerned that school would stifle his creativity. The mother, who is a friend of mine, says how great HSing is. But my DS gets a different story from his friend who my son says really misses going to school and being with lots of different kids (not just the ones in their very homogenous HS group). They spend so much time together and are quite frank in their conversations that I doubt that the neighbor boy is telling DS a polite lie so my DS doesn't feel bad!

    DS has another HG friend who was HS'ed for a year. His sister needed to be HSed for health reasons and P got pulled out of school to keep his sister company. He did a year of advanced work at home (with a marvelous family), but was quite miserable. Again, he missed the hustle and bustle of school. When he came back to school the next year, he was so happy. I'd see him working on work that was years below what he was capable of and I asked him how he liked it and he said it was well worth being a little bored to be back a school again.

    I don't mean to suggest that this is the whole story by any means. I do know that neither of these kids wanted to be homeschooled and neither of them seem to have liked it. Certainly, DS does not want to be homeschooled. So I think that listening to what a child wants makes a ton of sense.

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