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    sydness Offline OP
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    Everyone got to meat their teachers today. DD starts 4th grade next week and it's middle school. On the way to the classroom, Vice Principal stopped me and reminded me that I was to request a teacher meeting for the first week of school to discuss curriculum and she (VP) would like to attend. She also told me that she discussed my dd with the teacher ahead of time (I don't know which teacher - math or LA). So, After being friendly with LA teacher for a while, she started giving us the curriculum. She let us know that each child is required to read 20 minutes a day. Because many children were not doing this, they are required to do a "writing response" to a chapter once a week. She told us that these should be very detailed with statements and supporting facts. I told her that was great because DD9 is working on being able to support her inferences.



    My DD9, who is mostly shy and a people pleaser pipes up and says, "Well, I sometimes read the whole book in one day."



    LA teacher tells her that "You must be skimming a not really reading then." You have to slow down so you know the details of the story.



    LA teacher then tells us that a lot of kids don't actually read what they say they read.



    After a lot of this I told LA teacher that Vanessa did not "skim" and she doesn't lie about what she reads. AND I was very happy that she would be having the practice she needed in summarizing stories. I then turned to DD9 and told her that what the teacher is saying, is that if you read the whole book at one time and THEN do a summary, you might not remember some of the important details from the beginning of the story.

    She helped DD open her locker and told her not to worry about opening it right away and that they would work on lockers for a whole week. DD opened her locker right away.



    Then we met the Math teacher. I posted a while ago about asking the school to subject skip DD to 5th grade Math for this year. They DON'T do that. Were were going to try differentiation.



    So, after really liking the math teacher and her energy, I told her that I would like to set up a meeting to discuss how DD does on the pre-test. I believe that she has mastered much of the 4th grade curriculum and that I would like to understand how they were going to alter the curriculum to keep her progressing. (Per meeting with VP).



    I was told that I would not be allowed to see the results of the pretest. She said that there are enrichment activities available for the children who score over 90% on the pre-test and that a score of 98% would qualify her for a parental meeting. (I assume an IEP). She said she sends the pre-test home at the end of the year with the post test. She said that many of the bright kids actually score lower on the post test. (WHAT)!



    She told me that enrichment consists of "if she scores 90% on a pre-test in decimals, then she would make a decimal game for the whole class to play."

    She told me that homework was not a good way to assess what she was learning in class because she has to give all the kids the same homework.

    The correct the homework the next day in class all together and having different homework creates social issues.



    So, I said "That is why I was hoping to have her do Math with the 5th graders."

    To which she said, "We just don't have the personnel to make that happen."



    She said she would send home a challenge packet that DD can work on after she finishes her homework. I told her that didn't work last year, as she never got a chance to work on it. (It was more of the same sftuff anyway.) I told her that DD took an hour and a half sometimes to do easy homework saying that it was hard. DD interrupted me and said..."IT's NOT hard it just soooo boring I can't do it."



    I told the Math teacher that last year, one of the teachers gave DD harder homework instead of the regular classroom homework and this worked well and she did it quickly.



    The Math Teacher shook her head and couldn't believe that my DD took 1.5 hours on her homework and I was asking for harder work.



    She also told me that they NEED the advanced kids in the classroom so the other kids can learn from them!



    So when we left, I said, "So, I will be contacted if she gets of a 98% on her pre-test?"



    Math Teacher: "I'm not sure why we would do that."



    She also said that they are trying to create something that helps the kids who are ahead but they just aren't there yet. That we will have to take the little they offer.



    OMG.!!!! What do I do!?



    Am I CRAZY! IS THIS WORLD CRAZY!



    I must add. She thanked me for opening up this discussion. She also asked DD how she felt. DD shrugged. She asked DD what kind of work she liked. DD said she likes to work on harder things than what she gets.


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    {{Empathetic Banging My Head Against the Wall}} I've got a similar situation going on and I'm just continuously flabbergasted that schools don't truly want all kids to learn as much as they are ready for. Aargh!

    It sounds like you've had numerous talks and negotiations over the past couple of years. Any chance there are other school options out there? Any chance you could politely threaten to pull your good-for-their-standardized-scores daughter out of their school if they continue not to teach her appropriately? Have you pulled the "What a (MY) Gifted Child Doesn't Learn" card?


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    Sorry, I'm confused. Have you had the meeting the VP wants to attend, yet, or not? If you haven't, and this was happening before it, there may still be hope that the VP understands full well why the meeting has to happen, and you've just seen it...


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    sydness Offline OP
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    smile I have not had the meeting. I was told by the teacher that she didn't see why the meeting was necessary and therefore didn't schedule one! I'm so stupid to let that one get by! BUT my daughter was with us and I was trying to be nice as pie! smile

    We moved here a year ago. This school system was the solution to all our problems! LOL! UGH!

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    sydness Offline OP
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    They haven't pulled the "What my gifted child doesn't learn" card. I have had only one meeting with this school and with was with the VP about skipping DD to 5th grade math.

    Last year, I just gently reminded the teachers from time to time that my daughter had mastered the material she was bringing home from school. When I did this, the provided harder work.

    Last year wasn't so great though, as my daughter thought that if she didn't already know something, the work would be taken away from her and had to hide her books if she had to look something up...UGH! NOT a good start to the yaer...Off to meet DD6, first grade teacher...I have a better feeling about this!

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    Originally Posted by sydness
    They haven't pulled the "What my gifted child doesn't learn" card. I have had only one meeting with this school and with was with the VP about skipping DD to 5th grade math.

    I was thinking that you would want to make them aware of all the things your DD is missing out on because she aleady knows so much of the material, like the chance to learn to work hard and persevere, to deal with frustration, to have to learn time-management skills, etc. Schools tend to be very big on social development, even moreso than academic development, so if you can show them ways in which your daughter's social fit isn't appropriate or some ways in which her current situation is making her sad or depressed or whatever, it might go a long way.

    Originally Posted by sydness
    Last year, I just gently reminded the teachers from time to time that my daughter had mastered the material she was bringing home from school. When I did this, the provided harder work.

    Last year wasn't so great though, as my daughter thought that if she didn't already know something, the work would be taken away from her and had to hide her books if she had to look something up...UGH! NOT a good start to the yaer...Off to meet DD6, first grade teacher...I have a better feeling about this!

    I would reference in your meeting with the VP (which I would insist upon even if the teacher doesn't feel it necessary or isn't even there) the methods you tried last year and what worked and what didn't. It always helps to see things from the school's perspective, which is often that they are overworked, that the breadth of students' skills is so huge in any one classroom, and that they must, by necessity, focus primarily on getting the lower students up to grade level. Then, if it were me, I would point out ways in which subject or grade acceleration could help to solve both your concerns. Your DD could learn at an appropriate academic and social level and it wouldn't cost the school a thing since they would not have to provide your DD with any additional instruction or materials. You could suggest a trial acceleration to be looked at after 6 weeks. And, too, you could reassure them that you would accept full responsibility for the failure of any trial acceleration.


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    sydness Offline OP
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    -She would attend math with other 5th graders and be instructed and graded like any other 5th grader, without needing an altered curriculum.
    -She will be motivated to learn because she will be given instruction every day that is new material and interesting.
    -She will not be able to rush through her work carelessly and still get good grades.
    -She will not play games with her work or try to hide or hint at things because she will be receiving appropriate instruction and acknowledgment of her abilities.
    -She will have the opportunity to socialize with children who share her maturity and interests.
    -She will be with more children who are her height.
    -She will be less likely to hide her abilities to blend-in (although I don't think she is doing this now).
    -She will develop into a leader, promoting healthy learning habits among her peers.
    -If she is not challenged she will be distracted, unmotivated and possibly focus her attention on "other" things, that will result in lower grades and maybe even depression (I can see this happening now).

    This is the list I gave in my initial email to the VP...plus the rest of the letter.

    I will make that appointment with the VP and teacher soon...right now we are all preparing for IRENE! smile

    I hate to be a complainer before school even starts!

    On a side note. I brought DD6 to meet first grade teacher today. I poked around the classroom. Math seems appropriate for her, but there must have been hundreds of books for the kids to choose from and not one of them was a chapter book. But the teacher was super nice. I don't have the same worries for DD6 as she isn't ahead in EVERYTHING and she doesn't seem to be insulted when she is given work that she has already mastered. She seems to be more proud of herself for being able to do it so nicely. She is an August baby and with all the redshirting going on around here, is usually the youngest in the class.

    School works great for her. I'm not a complainer...School just doesn't work for my older girl..ugh.

    I am not gifted and sometimes I have a hard time with her math. She sometimes laughs at me for not understanding how she got an answer. Sometimes I tell her something is wrong and when she explains it to me, I realize that I'm the one who was wrong. So, I can't homeschool. frown....Husband is VERY pGifted, attending college at 14 with no pushing what-so-ever. So, I guess that's where DD9 gets her brains. I just wish there was somebody to take her seriously. I'm not equipped...I'm not equipped to teach her, but with the suport here, maybe I can advocate for her. Thanks for the comments.! smile

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    Originally Posted by sydness
    I am not gifted and sometimes I have a hard time with her math. She sometimes laughs at me for not understanding how she got an answer. Sometimes I tell her something is wrong and when she explains it to me, I realize that I'm the one who was wrong. So, I can't homeschool. frown
    I just want to say, doesn't necessarily follow. Teachers don't have to be always right; in fact, an important thing students have to learn is how to cope when they're sure of something the person teaching them doesn't get. (This happens to every good student at university level, if the university is doing its job, for example.) A better response than laughing is explaining really clearly; if your DD got good at this, it would stand her in very good stead. There are lots of sources of questions with correct answers, and there are ways for homeschoolers to get input from subject experts. If homeschooling was right for your family, you'd find a way.

    FWIW I made a note the first time my DS was right about some maths when I was wrong. He was 4.5. I'm not homeschooling, but I yet may!


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    Wow Sydness, I'm so sorry that this is how your year is starting. I wonder if requesting a meeting and having your DH attend with you would help. First, in a situation like you've described, there is strength in numbers. Second, I wonder if your DH's acceleration when he was school aged might convince them that it is both possible and necessary. Would he be willing to tell his story?

    I know you must be so disappointed and frustrated to get such ridiculous responses from these teachers. It's one thing for teachers to honestly explain the barriers they are facing (time, staffing, whatever....) and quite another for them to assume that your child isn't really reading with understanding or to assert that your child must do inappropriate work in order to avoid social problems. mad

    Now say three times out loud:
    "I am not crazy and my child DOES deserve an appropriate education". wink


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