Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Sleep...or lack thereof!

Hello,
I have read that gifted children require less sleep but am still concerned about how little DS8 gets. He is put to bed between 8-8.30pm but is likely to still be reading at 11pm (sometimes even later). He is usually asleep by midnight. I have tried insisting that he goes to sleep and taking away his books but he always finds something else to do (eg math games in his head!).
He wakes up around 7am on school days - earlier on weekends for some reason! He does not appear overly tired and gets good grades. I have therefore chosen not to push the issue anymore. I wanted to see what experiences others were having and if they decided to leave it alone or work on it. Does anyone know of research in this area with gifted kids?

I used to let DS5 go to bed whenever he wanted. Historically that was sometimes as late as 3 a.m. on a school night (he was miserable the next day). Midnight is nothing to him, except perhaps an excuse for a late lunch. We've recently started enforcing a 10:30 p.m. bedtime on school nights; I know it's not much, but it's a start. He usually reads in bed for a while after that. He has been less grouchy after getting to bed around that time, although he'll probably never be a morning person. In our case it's not that DS5 needs less sleep, but that he just doesn't like going to sleep much.

I wouldn't personally take books away from your son, since it sounds like he's doing all right. I know that reading can keep one awake, but it's still a physically passive activity that can also help one relax, and in the meantime your son will get hours of extra learning each week when he might just wind up staring at the ceiling otherwise. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Your son might just need a lot less sleep than normal.

Yes - I think you are right.
PS The 'extra learning' hours have become an issue. He ends up reading 2-3 hours a night in bed and I received an email from my son's teacher last month complaining that he has too many AR points. (What?!) She suggested that instead of making him sit and read,I should let him go outside and play!! I politely let her know that he is signed up for many different sports, goes to cub scouts and plays with neighborhood kids every day. (BTW, he is not overweight - infact he is in great shape).
I was really hoping that since she has been a gifted teacher for so many years, she would understand he is not ahead because he is sitting at home studying for hours. He just reads alot (and very quickly) and picks things up immediately. It's so frustrating to have to constantly defend yourself because your child is doing well!

Sounds like he is doing fine and is doing something constructive with his time.

I did this most of my childhood, except I would read until 2am or much later. I was very active in sports as well. Staying up past midnight would kill me the next day, sometimes. I think setting a limit of 7-8 hours of sleep a night should be sufficient. When he gets into harder classes and college, the habit he has of staying up late will serve him well.

We've noticed our DS4 needs more sleep when he's been actually learning things...

We let ours sleep until he wants and wake up when he wants so long as he makes it to school on time. He generally sleeps about as much as we do, ~8hrs/night unless he's sick, on a growth spurt, or just starting in a new and exciting environment full of learning possibilities. One of my aunts is one of those freakish people who only needs like 5-6 hours per night, and did throughout childhood (my mom was jealous).

If he's doing well on that amount of sleep, I wouldn't worry about it. Our DS8 is a night owl, taking after his mother, but he's a bear to get out of bed in the morning, also taking after his mother! It's a struggle on both ends of the day when school is in session.

On another note, umm...too many AR points? What, were they running out and she was afraid he wouldn't leave enough for someone else?

We too, are in the same boat. I can try with all my might to get DD to go to bed at 8-8:30pm and even when I take the books away, say lights out, she is still awake til 10:30pm many nights and is up at 6:30am for school. She always says she can't turn her mind off. She will read, and sometimes will keep reading and reading until I end up mad. She does awesome in school, so I try to just reinforce it, but the more I make an issue out of it, the more she stresses that she can't fall asleep. By 10pm I start getting very stern that it is way past bedtime and she needs to be asleep, an hour ago . She was that way as a baby too. Never needed much sleep. Once in a while, she'll crash and be asleep by 8:30pm, but that is NOT often!


If it's any consolation about the AR points, by daughter is 920% above goal! NO KIDDING! LOL! The thing people don't understand is, we don't MAKE them sit around and read.... they can't stop themselves from reading. I often laugh and say "how many other people have to TAKE BOOKS AWAY as punishment or threaten to remove all books" ? DD got told she wasn't allowed to take a book to recess, that she had to socialize (which is funny because DD is a social bitterfly, but I know when I have an extra minute to myself and in the middle of an awesome read, I want to spend every free minute I have reading it! Who can blame her! It's her free time. Now she sneeks it under her coat when she goes out to recess if that's what she wants to do