I agree with what others have said.

I can't serve as an example for you, I fear-- only as a warning.

My 11yo began her school career much the same way-- the school's idea of "enrichment" and "acceleration" was pretty radical...

but nowhere near what DD actually NEEDS. We, too, have been promised that "it will get better {next year/in middle school/in high school}" and it DOES NOT.

Every year, my daughter falls apart when she realizes that it is the same old story again, just with more output expectations to accompany the material she already knows. In other words, it was bad enough to write a paragraph about {topic she has known for years} at a level that she is well past... but as time goes on, those paragraphs become term papers. But the feeling is the same; that is, they don't learn anything from the exercise, no matter how TIME-CONSUMING it is.

Does this sound like torture? I think so.

It sounds as though you may have trouble getting even moderate accommodations if a few extra worksheets are all they had in mind as 'accommodation' for your gifted boy.

I'd homeschool in your situation. Since you've been told that your son should have an IEP, insist upon a meeting-- but be mentally prepared for them to be incapable of understanding just how different his needs are... or worse, understanding but not being ABLE to meet them.

I know that you may not like this, but the one thing that struck me about your post is that you don't feel that your son is being manipulative. Hmm. From experience, perhaps not consciously so... but savvy gifted kids are often HIGHLY manipulative. It's a coping skill; it doesn't indicate a character flaw or potential sociopathic behavior, though. Just something to be aware of. Generally when it comes up is when they are struggling with something that is intolerable in their environment and they lack the maturity/authority to do anythign else about it.

Your son's statements about suicide seem likely to fall into that category. That's one of my daughter's favorite methods, too-- because it is such a show-stopper that we literally have a tendency to drop everything to fix whatever is driving it. The Manipulative Child is a good read for parents of kids with this tendency; it gives good tools for ways to avoid reinforcing the behaviors, and turning them into more healthy means of communication generally.

Yes to SENG and a psychologist. Yes to an IEP meeting-- but do some homework about your options first. Know what you would LIKE to see (and what your son would like or needs).

Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.