I think this quote illustrates much about why we disagree and basic parenting philosophy differences that explain reactions to this subject. In retrospect, I wouldn't have changed anything about parenting or fostering ability or what I do with my kids based on their scores.
Hmmm...You make it sound like you think I'm obsessed with achievement, gratified3. I don't think that's true or fair.
I, too, think character development and play are vital to a child's development. Of course I do! And I did a good job on those things, doggone it! But giving a child those important things and offering developmentally appropriate intellectual stimulation are NOT mutually exclusive!
Maybe part of the problem is that my DS6 was in many ways a stealth-HG+ kid. I knew he was GT. But I didn't realize just what I was dealing with. And I'm sorry, but there's a big difference in the needs of a kid who's ND or just "a little" GT and one who is really extraordinarily bright. I am having a hard time believing that you don't think so! I don't think I met my son's intellectual needs until I knew just how smart he was. I'm glad you feel that you did exactly the right things for your kids, gratified, but I don't feel I did. More info would have helped me.
I'm not one to dwell on regrets; moreover, my regret wasn't really my point. My point is that there are, indeed, VALID REASONS for some of us to want to know about a child's abilities before school. This isn't just about advocacy, and it's certainly not about status-seeking, as I feel you are implying. (I admit, I'm a bit offended, though trying not to be...)
No. It's about providing a sufficiently stimulating home environment. DS6 has always been relatively quiet and polite and happy to entertain himself. Those are fine things. They make him easy to deal with. But they also masked his level of GTness.
I feel like my point is being trivialized here. You may certainly disagree with me. I can be easy to disagree with. But please don't try to make it sound as if I'm one of "those" hothousing moms with some wacky "parenting philosophy" that differs from your common sense one. Truth be told, I would describe my parenting philosophy just as you do yours. But my son could read at the 4th grade level in K, and I had absolutely nothing on his shelf that was above the 4th grade level; most of his books were a grade-level or three lower than that. I mean, I though having some books that were 4 years above grade level would be enough. I was wrong. And the math...ugh!
Maybe I was an idiot. Maybe I was inattentive. Maybe I
should have known. Maybe we weren't providing an adequate learning environment for
any kid. But I
didn't know, and I'd argue that the learning environment we provided would have been
exceptional for a kid who was ND or MG. But it was
NOT enough for an HG+ kid. And I know for a fact I'm not the only person who was surprised to find out her child was smarter than she realized.
Do I favor early testing? No, of course not. The only reason we figured out DS6's level of GT was because the K teacher wanted him tested. I didn't have him tested at all. I did no advocacy whatsoever. I wasn't hothousing. I wasn't pushing. But do I have regrets that he languished, when I see how happy he is now that he's not languishing? You betcha.
And I think that's a valid reason to want to ID these kids as early as possible. Through some means. I'd love a better means than testing!
