GF,
I see you've already been on here (perhaps as a lurker!) for over a year now...but welcome!
I am sorry to hear you are feeling alone and unknown. I hope you are able to separate your true value as a unique human being (which is immeasurably high) from the valuations other people set on you. And I encourage you that it is never too late to explore new and healthier ways of knowing and being known by others. If you have never engaged in a counseling relationship (or even if you have), it might be time to look for a sympathetic psychotherapist, who can help you begin to tease out the patterns that have been imposed on you, or into which you have fallen, from those that you will start to choose, that can take you in a healthier direction relationally.
My heart goes out to you. I pray Love finds you.
