Originally Posted by indigo
My point was that the linked theory was not focused on child development. Possibly the thread is beginning to stray from the OP's request on coaching her DD8, when that involves constructive criticism? I'd not want to contribute to hijacking a thread... possibly a new thread could be started for leadership theory?
I apologize. I often consider connections obvious that probably aren't.

The OP's request concerns constructive criticism on behavior with the goal to change the behavior. Intentional change theory concerns sustained desired behavior change in individuals—including children. It offers a theoretical model to discuss achieving the desired goal.

The OP's request concerns parenting. Parenting is leadership.

The OP's request concerns the child's emotional reaction to criticism. PEA–NEA theory concerns the opposing emotional attractors, what activates them, how to activate the PEA rather than the NEA, what implications being in the PEA or NEA has, and offers supplemental information for intentional change theory—which, again, offers a theoretical model to discuss achieving the OP's desired goal.