... when your super-compliant, teacher-pleaser DD happily reports that she is being louder (by which she means talking more and being a goofball) in class, that she has found a partner in this crime, and that they have prompted one extremely nice teacher in particular to repeatedly ask, "Do I have to separate you two?" She reports that school is much more fun when she's loud.

And rather than admonish her, you congratulate her, and remind her that you'd been advising her to do this kind of thing for years.

DD categorizes this partner as a "frenemy," which she defines as a former enemy that she has turned into a friend. A year ago, this was the same kid who was bullying her severely enough that I had to contact the school. Now, as DD describes it, "She's still mean to people, but she's not mean to me."

DD has assembled quite a collection of frenemies.