I second Dude's advice
I've had to advocate in both "directions" for my kids at school (2e - advocating for appropriate challenge and help where they need it). This is a brief list of what's been most useful in advocating (and I'll most likely forget something):
1) Examples of schoolwork (it doesn't have to be done at school - if there's something you want the teacher to know your child can or can't do and you don't have an example of their work from school you can have your child do it at home).
2) Reports or letters from outside private professionals. School staff can be very stubborn about agreeing that another professional's opinion is valid, but having the documentation is still very helpful - if it's questioned, in return you state simply "Are you questioning the opinion of a professional with __(fill-in-the-blank)__ credentials?"
3) Be familiar with your local school district policy and with what's available. School staff are not always going to inform you of what they can do or offer your child, and on the flip side of that if you're asking for something pie-in-the-sky that other equally deserving children aren't ever getting, you're most likely going to get a "no" as well as potentially create negative feelings in your relationship with school staff.
4) Really know your child well. Cover all your bases. Be confident that what you are saying about your child is true and real and grab all the data you can to back that up.
5) If you have the resources and are interested in private testing, I would get it.
6) You might find in researching what is available in your district that parents can request that their children be tested for gifted program or gifted id - if this is the case, make the request in writing now.
7 Make a list (have it in writing) of everything that you have seen your child capable of doing and all the reasons that you think he needs accelerated curriculum. Also make a list of what you think he specifically needs - and prioritize the needs. You might not ever turn those lists over to anyone, but having it in writing and carrying it along to meetings helped me a lot in terms of keeping focused on priorities and also remembering key points to use when teachers or school staff were trying to debate ds' capabilities.
8) Remember that it's important to do everything you can to approach advocacy in a positive manner. The teachers and school aren't your foes in a battle, they are your partners in educating your child. Each time you need to contradict something the school staff tries to tell you, stick to your facts, stick to the data you have, and politely restate what you need to say. Every time you have a meeting or a conversation with a teacher, send a brief and nicely worded email as a follow-up after the meeting stating what you understand was discussed and what you and (whoever) agreed upon.
A few other thoughts for you - the beginning of school is a crazy-busy time. Our school has been in session for four weeks now and kids and teachers and schedules are just now really getting into the groove. The start of a new school year is especially challenging in kindergarten because the teacher has children who have no track record in school - the teacher is learning about their abilities while the kids are learning how to navigate the whole school thing - keeping boots in their cubbies, sitting in circle, getting excited about snack time or the library or being around big kids, learning to line up in a line to go to lunch, figuring out when they can go to the bathroom, meeting other kids.... it's basically a bit of a zoo for awhile. Your child may have all that down pat, but she's in a classroom with a wide variety of kids and experiences, and his teacher is juggling all of it. So patience for the teacher's sake (and ability to fit everything in) as well as patience in knowing (for you) that even if your child isn't challenged right now in the first months of school that doesn't mean it will always be like this.
The other thing about kindergarten that happened from what I saw at our schools (and it may or may not be happening where you are) - is that there are a *lot* of parents who want their child to be challenged, and your child is most likely not the only child coming into school already reading or doing math. I can't tell you how many moms of my kids' classmates back in K-1 I heard who were frustrated with the pace of school, wanted more challenge for their kids... and also were convinced their children were highly gifted. Years later (our gifted pullouts start in 3rd grade) most of those parents who were so out-there talking to me and other fellow parents about it in kindergarten had kids who qualified for the gifted program. So think about what might be happening from the teacher's side of things - I was hearing that from a lot of parents who, quite honestly, I can't imagine why they'd even be talking about it to me - I'm a person who doesn't really talk about those things with other people unless someone asks something specific about my kids.... and I'm guessing there have to be other parents of gifted kids out there who are like me. Those parents who are talking about their kids to other moms like me are most likely also pushing the teacher for challenge/enrichment/testing etc - so the teacher (and school) may very well be conditioned to hearing parents ask for extras for their children and may have a propensity to not weight those requests very high simply because they get a lot of them... and many of them may not rest on any substantial and true need. Leaving things to sort themselves out in the classroom over time takes care of a lot of the parents who are pushing for gifted services when their child doesn't really qualify. The note from the teacher about children who are placed in kindergarten math will still be able to take calculus in high school sounds to me as if your school is used to having a lot of parents pushing for more for their kids.
I think for now I'd work on informally building up your relationship with the teacher and continue to monitor how things are going for your dd. If there is a procedure in place in your district to request testing for gifted id in K, turn in your request in writing. If you can afford or have access to outside private testing, and can do it before you have conferences, move forward with that for peace of mind and to have data to document your dd's needs at the conferences in October. In the meantime, you can also after-school your dd in any area she or you want to.
Hope some of that made sense! Good luck!
polarbear
