Tara,

Thanks. This again is the sort of question to which there is no final answer, of course.

Incidentally, it occurred to me after I posted that it might seem as if I were criticizing you or other parents who make advanced materials available to their gifted kids. Thanks for interpreting my remarks charitably and not taking them in the wrong way.

I�m actually quite �gung-ho� about getting kids access to any resources that interest them academically, even if those resources are beyond their current level � it shouldn�t hurt anyone to puzzle over a book about calculus or black holes, even if, in the end, he or she puts it on the shelf to look at it again in a year or so.

Puzzling over things is a very good thing.

So, I�m certainly not trying to intimate that anyone here is allowing his or her child to accelerate too rapidly. In the case of my college friend, both of his parents were mathematics professors, so it is not surprising that he had very strong talent in this area. I did always wonder, though, if they intentionally created a �hothouse� atmosphere that pushed him to develop at a rate even faster than the rapid rate he would have developed on his own.

This is an issue for me in my own mind because my kids do not seem quite as self-motivated as many of the kids being discussed here in terms of asking for material at the level they are able to handle. Perhaps (I�d like to think!) they are just so used to getting material appropriate to their level of development that they see no need to ask for it. But, I am concerned that I might �push� material on them that they might be able, barely, to handle, but that they do not really enjoy and that does not really foster their long-term development.

Incidentally, I am not mentioning my old friend�s name because I am really just using some vague impressions and speculations about his life as a springboard for raising issues that concern me. All I really know for certain about him is that he was profoundly brilliant and an awfully nice guy (he would of course be labeled �Asperger�s� nowadays, which is paasingly strange, since I knew him to be more sensitive and compassionate about others� feelings than most �normal� people are). For all I know, he may consider his entire life to be the absolute ultimate of �bliss,� as you put it � I certainly hope so.

Anyway, thanks for your comments. I know no magic key to definitively answer the questions I�ve raised with you, but it does help to hear your thoughts and experiences.

All the best,

Dave