My ex- SIL was an expert in reading- in fact wrote reading curriculum for a school district. Eventually my parents and I had to edit all of our conversations and be super careful about anything related to my son around her but I can't stop my son from being who he is and would never want to. My ds is a prolific reader( bordering on obsessive- he has to have book with him at all times :)). He reads way above his reading level, as I'm sure most of your kids do- we realized we had to censor around her when I asked my SIL for reading suggestions for books that are at his level but content appropriate her response was- you should really just keep him reading what his peers read for fear of social implications. Seriously from a reading expert and curriculum writer in my own family??? Needless to say we stopped talking about reading with her or anything to do with his accomplishments with her. Before i knew we should not ask her- there was one book he was dying to read- I asked her about it- she said- I know he is smart but there is now way he will understand that book- she said- that is a junior high book and he is only 7....I decided not to listen to her let him read it because I listened to my Mommy gut- her "social implications" comment came shortly after that one. I realized she was not going to understand or be helpful. The look on her face at the next family function when he went on and on about his anew favorite book that he had read a couple times by that point ( the one she said he would not understand) was priceless. On a positive note, recently a junior high teacher saw him at a book store( half priced books is our friend) and initiated a conversation with him as we were discussing books. He is rather passionate and remembers every detail of every book he has ever read- so I am sure to hear us is entertaining. She asked him all sorts of questions and got book recommendations for her 7th and 8th graders( ds is in 3rd) She said she hoped to run into us again and wishes she had the opportunity to teach someone like him. She even told me- you know ther are schools where you can have him graduate high school early and go to college in high school- right? It was so refreshing to run into someone who wanted to nurture his intellect!!!! She was so positive and excited about his reading and intellect. She told him your a little genius aren't you. My ds immediately started spouting statistics about the percentage of the population that are truly "geniuses". She laughed and said and I believe you are on of them- he smiled and made his day. Amazing what a stranger can do how a family member can attempt to shut you down.
